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03 October 2012

Shitty Mom Moment #87

It's 11:27 am, I'm on cup of coffee number 48.3.

This morning, like clockwork, at 6:32 am, my daughter got out of bed. She found me half hanging off the sofa with Xbox controller still in hand, drooling, and snoring peacefully sleeping and proceeded with ripping me from the safe abyss of unconsciousness her normal waking-mommy routine of smacking patting my face and screaming sweetly singing the good morning song - all while reminding me that the God forsaken ball of early morning cornea burning evil Sun is up and that means we must be up, too. Because, God forbid we miss a nano second of that damn Sun being up we can't wait to get started on our day!

She told me she was hungry for fruit and milk.  I vaguely remember turning on Go, Diego, Go.
... Food, Diego, same thing.

She's barely three and I think it's perfectly reasonable that  in my half asleep stupor, I asked her to make me a cup of coffee. She disappeared and returned with that damn awful super cute singing tea pot and a tea cup of water. I'm pretty sure the water came from the toilet. She can reach the sink with her step-stool.

She reminded me she was hungry for fruit and milk. I reminded her that she has pre-portioned snacks within reach and helped her decide that she'd rather eat Cheetos and drink a Capri-Sun immediately hopped up and retrieved her some nutritious fruit and a glass of milk.

fell back asleep got up and started my workout while she quietly did the cat's make-up watched Diego and ate her Cheetos fruit.